Sunday mASSterpiece

I have been to church since Oscar's inception but only in the form of weddings and funerals.  I had yet to actually partake in a full catholic mass, it has been 15 years or more since I was comfortable enough to sit on the wooden pews or kneel for any length of time.
Today I joined Oma, Aunt Lori and my mom at a new church in London. We had just moved Oma from Windsor to London and wanted to show Oma some support in her new city. I haven't been a practicing Catholic in years but I did find that going to mass was very soothing, not much had changed in the years I had been absent.
I was able to look around and appreciate the beautiful stained glass windows and give my full attention to the priest's sermon in a way I hadn't t been able to do in a very long time. I also realized structured religion isn't my thing and was glad I could put to rest the thoughts of "should I or shouldn't I" regarding returning to church. I also realized how very quiet 200 or more people can be when faced with the Lord.
I thought everything was going swimmingly until Oscar started to make some snuffling noises...the kind where all you have to do is put your hand over the stoma and it quiets down. Then somewhere between communion and the final procession that signals the end of mass, Oscar let it rip, thankfully, so did the singer. I have never heard a note quite like the one she belted out and neither apparently did Oscar because he was singing for all he was worth.  I never realized a stoma could make those type of noises and I secretly think Oscar was trying to concoct his own symphony accompaniment to the third verse. I did everything in my power to quiet him but he was intent on letting every single sole in the church, living and dead, know that he was present and singing as loudly as he could.
After what seemed like hours when in reality it was only a minute or so, he shut up and I had a pouch full of his offerings. Apparently my four dollars wasn't quite enough. I glanced around at the retreating parishioners and no one was the wiser. Oscars assterpiece...errr...masterpiece went unnoticed by everyone except me. 
Thank you Oscar for allowing me to partake in mass, though I don't think you are cut out for the choir just yet.